mydogsessence

Why Your Dog Needs to Shred — And Why You Shouldn’t Get Upset About It

If you’ve ever walked into a room and found your dog joyfully shredding napkins, tissues, a cardboard box, or the mail (whoops)… take a breath.
Your dog isn’t trying to annoy you.
They’re expressing a deep, natural need that’s built into who they are.

Shredding is not misbehavior — it’s communication, instinct, and emotional release all wrapped in one.

Let’s break down why shredding matters, and how you can use it to strengthen your bond instead of getting frustrated.

Shredding Is a Natural Instinct

Dogs shred for many reasons, all of them rooted in normal canine behavior:

🐾 1. It feels good.

Shredding activates your dog’s dissecting instinct — something all dogs have.
Tearing something apart is mentally satisfying and physically enriching.

🐾 2. It relieves stress.

Some dogs shred when they’re anxious or unsure how to process emotions.
Shredding gives them a healthy outlet to release frustration, tension, or nervous energy.

🐾 3. It’s a boredom buster.

If your dog is full of energy and has nothing to do, they’ll naturally try to create their own “job.”
Shredding becomes a self-made activity.

🐾 4. It builds confidence.

Every successful tear is a tiny win.
For nervous dogs, shredding can make them feel powerful, capable, and in control.

Don’t Punish the Need — Understand It

When you catch your dog shredding something “forbidden,” it’s easy to react with:

❌ “No!”
❌ “Why would you do this?!”
❌ “Bad dog!”

But here’s the truth:
Your dog isn’t being disrespectful, stubborn, or spiteful.

They’re telling you:
“I’m feeling something. I need an outlet.”

Instead of asking “Why are you doing this?” try shifting your mindset to:

“Are you feeling the need to shred? Thanks for telling me. Let me help you.”

This shift changes everything.

Because when we get angry, we don’t just stop the behavior —
we break trust.
We make our dogs afraid to express natural needs.
We shut down communication.

But when you respond with understanding, you tell your dog:
“I see you. Let me support you.”

And that builds connection, safety, and teamwork.

Give Them Something Legal to Shred

If your dog needs to shred, you can guide that need instead of fighting it (because you CAN’T fight genetics).

Try offering:

  • Cardboard boxes
  • Toilet paper rolls
  • Old newspapers
  • Paper bags
  • Dog-safe shreddable toys
  • DIY enrichment shredding activities

This teaches your dog:
✔️ You’re allowed to shred
✔️ But here’s where and what you can shred
✔️ And I’m here to help you feel safe while you do it

It turns a “problem behavior” into a shared activity that strengthens your relationship.

“Won’t encouraging shredding make my dog shred even more?”

Here’s the honest answer:

If your dog is a shredder… they’re a shredder.
It’s part of their genetics.

Allowing them to shred appropriate items won’t create the behavior —
it just gives them a safe, healthy outlet for a natural instinct they already have.

When you meet your dog’s needs, the urge to shred forbidden items actually decreases.
A dog with a healthy outlet is a calmer, happier dog.

Understanding the Need = Stronger Relationship

Shredding is not defiance.
It’s information.
It’s communication.
It’s instinct.

And when you respond with curiosity instead of frustration, you help your dog:

  • manage their emotions
  • release stress
  • build confidence
  • trust you more deeply

Because you’re no longer the “party pooper” shutting down their needs —
you’re their partner, their helper, their safe place.

Want a DIY Shredding Activity?

I’ve got you covered.
Here’s an easy, safe, super-fun shredding project you can make at home — perfect for giving your dog the outlet they’re craving.

And if shredding is something your dog struggles with in a big way, or if you’re worried about resource guarding, anxiety, or over-excitement, I’m always here to guide you through it so you can turn this instinct into connection instead of frustration.

mydogsessence

“Does My Dog Really Need Medication?” 5 thing to Check and Try First Before Reaching for the Prescription

If you’re feeling overwhelmed and wondering if medication is the answer for your anxious or reactive dog, you’re not alone. But before you go down that path, there’s a lot you can do to help your dog feel better, naturally and kindly.

When we live with a dog who’s constantly anxious, hyperactive, or struggling with their environment, it’s easy to feel lost. It’s natural to want relief—for them and for ourselves. Medication might seem like the fastest solution.

And let me start by saying this clearly:
I’m not against medication. I believe it absolutely has a time and place. Some dogs truly need it to feel safe in their world, and I support responsible use of medication when it’s the best choice.

But I also believe this:
Not all dogs need it. And it’s not fair—or ethical—to medicate a dog just to make our lives easier without first exploring what might be missing from their lives.

There Are Steps to Take Before Medication

If you’re considering medication, I invite you to pause and ask:

– What have I already tried to help my dog feel better?
– Am I supporting my dog’s physical, emotional, and mental well-being in every way I can?

Here are 5 foundational things to examine first:

1. Physical Exercise: Is My Dog’s Body Tired Enough?

Every dog is different. A 10-minute walk may be enough for a senior Chihuahua, but it won’t cut it for a young herding breed.
Ask yourself:

  • Does my dog get regular, age-appropriate physical activity?
  • Does this activity match my dog’s breed, energy level, and individual needs?

Without the right kind of movement, many behavior problems start to appear.

2. Mental Stimulation: Is My Dog’s Brain Getting a Workout Too?

A tired body isn’t enough, your dog’s mind needs exercise too.
Enrichment games, sniffing activities, training games, and puzzle toys can help reduce anxiety and prevent boredom-based behaviors. We need to keep changing those activities to avoid falling into a routine and not being challenging enough.

Ask yourself:

  • Am I giving my dog opportunities to think and solve problems each day?
  • Is the mental stimulation I’m offering the right fit for my dog?

3. Diet: Is My Dog Getting Nourished from the Inside Out?

Food affects behavior more than we often realize.
A processed, kibble-heavy diet—even the expensive stuff—can lead to inflammation, gut issues, and poor emotional health.

Consider:

  • Switching to a fresh, whole-food diet
  • Adding real food toppers to kibble
  • Incorporating a high-quality probiotic to promote gut health

Why the gut matters:
Your dog’s brain and gut are deeply connected. A healthy gut can improve mood, stress response, and even sleep.

4. Safety at Home: Can My Dog Truly Relax?

If your dog doesn’t feel safe at home, it’s nearly impossible for them to feel calm anywhere else.

Ask yourself:

  • Can my dog fully rest at home without being constantly on alert?
  • What noise, tension, or chaos might be affecting my dog’s peace?

Sometimes just removing a few daily stressors can dramatically improve how your dog feels.

5. Stressors & Triggers: What Can I Minimize or Eliminate?

Your dog’s environment plays a huge role in their emotional state.
Look around and ask:

  • What triggers can I reduce (even temporarily)?
  • Can I give my dog more space or time to process challenging situations?

We don’t have to throw our dogs into stressful environments just to “teach” them to deal with it. Gentle, well-thought-out training works better and is much kinder.

When Medication Is the Right Call

If you’ve addressed the above and your dog is still struggling, medication might be the next step. And that’s okay.

But it should never be a shortcut.
Instead, it should be part of a larger plan, designed in partnership with a qualified veterinary behaviorist and supported by a positive, science-based training plan.

Medication doesn’t replace training or lifestyle adjustments, it helps make them more effective.

You Don’t Have to Do This Alone

I know how overwhelming this all can feel. If you’re unsure where to start or what your dog needs most, I’m here to help.

🧡 I offer free 30-minute consultations so we can talk about your dog, your life, and your goals.
Let’s take a kind, thoughtful, and effective approach together.

📧 Email me at marly@mydogsessence.com to book your free consultation.
Let’s help your dog feel better and help you feel confident and supported too.

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How to Help Your Dog Stay Safe and Calm in the Car

When it comes to car rides, many pet parents focus on getting from point A to point B—but how your dog travels matters just as much as where you’re going.

A crate in the car isn’t just about safety in case of an accident (though that’s reason enough). It also plays a key role in your dog’s emotional regulation.

When dogs ride loose in the car, they often start getting overexcited or overstimulated before you even arrive at class, the park, or the vet. The combination of movement, passing cars, people, and even seeing other dogs builds emotional intensity—and if this happens regularly, it becomes a habit.

Soon, car rides = instant excitement.
Which means by the time you reach your destination, your dog is already overloaded and less able to focus, learn, or stay calm.

Using a crate helps your dog associate the car with calmness and safety. It becomes their place to settle, not to scan the world or build tension.

And the more they practice being calm in the crate, the easier it becomes for them to stay calm in other situations too, like walking into class ready to learn, not explode.

Crating your dog in the car:

  • Keeps them physically safe
  • Encourages emotional stability
  • Builds a habit of calm travel
  • Makes transitions into new environments much smoother

The calmer your dog rehearses being, the more predictable and enjoyable life becomes for both of you.

Bottom line? The crate is more than a safety tool, it’s a mindset shifter.
Start today, and help your dog build the habit of calm from the moment the car door closes.

Make sure to take your dog’s measurements and check that the crate fits in your car 😉. Here are a two crate options:

Crate training doesn’t have to be stressful for you or your dog.
If you’d like guidance on helping your dog feel calm and happy in their crate, I’m just an email away! Contact me at marly@mydogsessence.com.

mydogsessence

Listening With Your Eyes: The Importance of Dog Body Language

One of the most powerful tools you can have as a dog owner is the ability to read your dog’s body language. Our dogs are communicating with us all the time—but unlike us, they don’t use words. Instead, they use posture, movement, facial expressions, and energy to share how they’re feeling. And when we learn to understand those subtle cues, we become better advocates, better handlers, and better friends to our dogs.

It’s OK If Your Dog Doesn’t Like Everyone

Just like people, dogs have preferences. Some are social butterflies, and others are more selective with who they’re comfortable around. And that’s okay. What’s not okay—at least in our human world—is when a dog expresses their discomfort through aggressive behavior like growling, lunging, or biting.

But here’s the thing: those behaviors are your dog’s way of saying, “Please give me space.” They are often the result of smaller, earlier signals being ignored—like turning their head away, licking their lips, yawning, tensing up, or trying to retreat. When those signs are missed or dismissed, a dog may feel they have no choice but to escalate their communication.

Know Your Dog, So You Can Help

That’s why it’s so important to know your dog. Every dog is different. Learning their stress signals, triggers, and comfort zones allows you to step in before things go sideways. If your dog seems unsure or uneasy, you can redirect, offer space, or use training games to help them feel more in control. These small actions can make a big difference in your dog’s confidence and emotional safety.

It’s Not Just Stress, It’s Excitement, Too

Being able to read your dog isn’t only about recognizing fear or discomfort—it’s also about recognizing excitement. Overexcitement can lead to behaviors like jumping on people, barking, or pulling on the leash. These moments often get labeled as “bad behavior,” when really, they’re just emotional overflow.

If you see your dog getting amped up before greeting someone, take a moment to help them settle before saying hello. Use calm reinforcement, reward quiet behavior, and give them a second to breathe. This helps prevent the jumpy hellos and teaches your dog how to navigate social moments with calmness and confidence.

Use Training Games to Support Your Dog

While you’re working through the situations your dog finds hard—whether it’s being around new people, visiting the vet, or greeting other dogs—you can use training games to help. Games build positive associations, strengthen your bond, and give your dog tools to cope with stress or excitement. Plus, they’re fun for both of you!

If you’d like to learn what games are right for your dog and how to use them in real life situations, reach out to me here, I’d love to help you get started.

To Sum It Up:

Understanding your dog’s body language isn’t about preventing all challenges, it’s about responding with compassion, guidance, and awareness. The more we learn to observe and listen to our dogs, the better we can support them in feeling safe, secure, and successful in the human world.

Your dog doesn’t need to love every person or situation. They just need you, their handler, advocate, and teammate to notice, understand, and help them through it.

So take the time to learn, observe, and grow alongside your dog. Celebrate their efforts, meet them where they are, and let your training journey be rooted in trust and love. The more you understand them, the deeper your bond becomes and there’s nothing more beautiful than truly knowing and loving your dog for who they are.

Want to dive deeper into reading your dog’s signals? Here are two wonderful books I highly recommend:

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Why Letting Your Dog Choose is So Powerful

One of the most effective ways to build a confident, thoughtful dog is to reward the choices they make — not just the commands they follow.

Why It Matters
When your dog decides on their own to disengage from a distraction and come back to you, that’s a decision worth celebrating! You’re reinforcing their ability to think, not just react to a cue. That moment becomes a powerful learning opportunity:

“Wow, leaving that smelly bush and returning to my human was so worth it!”

If you always call them away from the distraction, they don’t get to practice the skill of disengaging on their own. They miss the chance to learn that choosing to come back pays off in praise, treats, and connection.

Here’s the beauty of it:
When your dog chooses correctly, good consequences follow — like reinforcement, treats, and praise. If they don’t make the right choice, the consequence is simply that no reward happens.
But the consequences are never about correction or intimidation. You’re not coaching them with pressure — you’re giving them space to learn through experience. That builds confidence, self-esteem, and strengthens your relationship.

Dogs who are allowed to make choices (and learn from them) trust us more. They want to be near us — because we’re fun, fair, and predictable.

Training vs. Management (both good!)
There’s a difference between training and management:

  • If the situation is dangerous or overwhelming, step in and manage it — call your dog, leash them, move away. Safety always comes first.
  • But if the distraction is safe (like a leaf pile, a person at a distance, or a dog behind a fence), use it as a training opportunity. Wait quietly. Watch. When they choose to disengage and come back to you — that’s your moment. Celebrate it!

Confidence Through Choice
Rewarding your dog’s good decisions helps them build confidence — and confident dogs:

  • Are better problem-solvers
  • Bounce back faster from stressful or negative situations
  • Make calmer choices in new environments
  • Are more fun and reliable to live with

So let’s set our dogs up to win:

✔️ Use training setups where the “right” choice is likely
✔️ Reinforce any good decision they make — not just the ones you ask for
✔️ Help them feel like the hero of their own story!

When we build a dog who chooses well on their own, we’re not just training obedience — we’re creating a relationship based on trust, respect, and mutual joy.

And that is powerful.

Have fun training and enjoy your dog!

Want help teaching your dog to make better choices? Contact us at marly@mydogsessence.com and book a free 30-minute consult. I’d love to help!

Read or share this post in the Spanish version.

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I Just Dog-Trained My Son!

As a dog trainer, I often find myself using training techniques with my own family, and it works surprisingly well! Recently, I had a great moment with my son that reminded me how similar dog training can be to parenting. Here’s what happened:

My son had been saving up for weeks to buy a special pair of baseball gloves. When he finally had enough money, we ordered them online, and he was eagerly waiting for their arrival. The day the gloves arrived, he left for school without making his bed, something I usually ask him to do. So, I thought, why not add a little fun to the process?

When I picked him up from school, I asked him to make his bed, but I had a surprise hidden in the blankets – the baseball gloves he had been dreaming of! The look on his face when he found them was priceless. He hadn’t been forced or blackmailed into making his bed; instead, he received a surprise reward for doing something simple, which had a huge positive impact.

Since then, making his bed has a whole new meaning. It’s no longer a dreaded chore, but something he associates with positive surprises. Yes, from time to time, I might need to add a little something extra if I want to keep up the excitement, but it’s worth it to maintain that positive connection.

This reminded me so much of how we train our dogs. If we surprise them with something special – like a piece of chicken or steak – when they come to us after being called, they’ll remember the reward. The next time we call them, they’ll associate the act with something wonderful.

In both cases, the key is making training or tasks fun and rewarding. No one, human or dog, enjoys punishment or feeling like they’re being forced into something. When we make it enjoyable and sometimes sprinkle in a surprise, the actions have a lasting, positive impact.

Training doesn’t have to be complicated or stressful. Whether it’s getting your son to make his bed or teaching your dog to come when called, the principles are the same – keep it simple, fun, and rewarding!